Disaster survival guide

Sometimes in life, disaster strikes. By disaster, I mean both Wi-Fi and 3G simultaneously going tits up. This is, I’ll admit, a major first world problem, but a problem it is. No Twitter, Blogger, Tumblr, Instagram; I can’t even see the babies-having-babies-chav-fest that is Facebook. As Twitter and Instagram were my go-to happy places to keep my thumbs busy while getting used to not texting my ex, I needed a survival plan - and fast.

• Go for a walk: seems simple enough, why didn’t I think of it earlier? Because I was too busy looking at #instagood #nailart, that’s why.  
• Read: in the past month or so, I have read the second and third Game of Thrones books (Jon Snow, why are you not mine?) Snow Child, Oscar Wilde’s poetry and Moranthology. Let me tell you, they have a lot more to say than my twitter feed does.
• Cook: did you know how easy it is to make your own bread? No, neither did I, I was too busy doing Tumblr searches of Jon Snow (again, why is he not mine?)
• Notice things: when on a bus, around 99% of the bus riders, if that is the correct term, are looking at their smartphones. Presumably, they too have found a photo of a cat. But when you put your phone down and look around, you will notice so many beautiful buildings. For example, I have only just realised that the McDonalds on Oxford Road in Manchester used to be a cinema.
• Talk to people: this one seems the most obvious, but when you are out with people, you can actually talk to them. Similarly, your phone can also be used phone people, who knew?!
• Sort: I hate sorting, really hate it, but life does feel that bit better when you have a neatly folded pile of old clothes, all ready for eBay
• Think: I am no philosopher, but when I let my mind wander, it occasionally does come up with a few funny thoughts and very occasionally some clever thoughts
• Write: when you don’t have a boyfriend to text your occasional funny and more occasional clever thoughts, you can note them in a notebook, type them in a blog (albeit on Word, to publish later), or tell your friends

I might be wrong, but this life sounds far more interesting and worthwhile than stalking photos of a girl you haven’t spoken to since secondary school, even if she does wear nice clothes 

song of the post - 3am spiritual - Smith Westerns